It's How
You Wiggle The Worm"
Laughter Therapy Fun Page
"It Ain't
How Deep You Fish;
It's How
You Wiggle The Worm"
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Points
5 pts. if you
laugh till you wet your pants. 10 pts. if you wet someone else's pants.
5 pts. if you spit out food laughing. 8
pts. if you spit it across the table. 10 pts. if you spit it across the room.
1 pt. if you laugh once/day. 5 pts. if
you laugh 5x/day. 10 pts. if you laugh
10x/day.
5 pts. if you have friends who laugh. You
belong to a gaggle of gigglers.
5 pts. for being playful at least once/day.
"Life can be the toy in your own happy meal."
10 pts. if you have laughed about a serious
issue at least once. If you haven't had a serious issue in your
life, you get 15 points for
your amazing luck.
10 pts. if you laugh at work whenever
possible. Laughing at those work woes will help you relax.
5 pts. if you enjoy laughing about
life. It's just a play, you know.
15 pts if you avoid laughing in ridicule.
"No downloading."
10 pts. if you find the humor in your
everyday life at least once/day. Of course, it may find you first.
10 pts. if you have no rules about laughing.
What a shocking loss of control!
5 pts. if you enjoy a bit of silliness.
It's cool to be silly at times.
5 pts. if you wear a funny hat now and
then. Let laughter go to your head.
5 pts. if you have personal toys. 8
pts. if you play with them. 10 pts. if you play with others.
10 pts. if you laugh in public without
concern others will think you're crazy.
5 pts. if you laugh in public so others
will think you're crazy.
5 pts. if you enjoy the absurd. 10 pts.
if you enjoy acting absurd.
5 pts. if you can laugh at will. 10
pts. if you laugh right now.
10 pts. if you laugh during sex. Sex doesn't
need to be serious.
5 pts. if you enjoy your laugh lines,
both facial as well as verbal.
5 pts. if you like shaking like a bowl
full of jelly inside and out.
5 pts. if everyone's laugh gives you
pleasure. Feelin' good!!!
Now total up your points.
136-165 pts. You are a laughing genius.
75-135 pts. You are an honors laugher.
40-75 pts. You are an average laugher.
0-39 pts. You are in danger of contracting laughter lockjaw. Rx- A spoonful of laughter at least 3x daily until the pain goes away. Note: You will need to be on this medicine for the rest of an interesting life. Abruptly stopping the medication will lead to severe withdrawal and your entire body will rigidify.
©1999, Enda Junkins, 3200 N. MacArthur Blvd., Ste. 106, Irving, Tx 75062 (972) 255-5233 (LAFF)
Laughing
At Times That Aren't Funny
(If you have a story to share, click here to send it to us)
My mother had been dying for weeks. My brother and I were caring for her in her home. We were very sad and pushed ourselves to make certain we gave her the best of care. The day came when she died and we had to call the paramedics to come for her body. They arrived and my brother and I sat down on the porch while they gathered her up. We were both feeling practically numb and hadn't even noticed the storm clouds overhead. Then, just as they wheeled our mother out, there was a huge clap of thunder. My brother and I looked at each other and burst out laughing. It was just the way our mother would have liked to make her exit. Our laughter eased our pain and helped us go on. C.W., Dayton, Ohio.
It was a glorious Sunday morning. I looked forward to Sunday school and church, so I got my children up, dressed and fed them, and set off for the church. I noticed on the way that there was very little traffic, and while that was unusual, I wasn't terribly concerned. Then we arrived at the church, and there were no cars in the parking lot! Because I had been studying the second coming of Christ, I panicked. My immediate thought was that Jesus had come during the night and left me and my kids. I could accept him leaving me but not my kids! Then I heard a man's voice call "Good Morning." The man living across the street had come out for his newspaper. When I asked where everyone was, he reminded me that we had the time change during the night. I realized I was an hour early and Jesus hadn't come after all. I laughed with relief at my own foolishness and embarrassment at thinking Jesus had come and left us. My laughter then and since about that morning has given me lots of good feelings. B.D., Jackson, MI.
(If you have humor to share, click here)
Bumper Stickers:
"Every day above ground is a good
day."
"Horn broken. Watch for finger."
"Did you wake up grumpy today or did you let her sleep?"
"Women don't live longer. It just seems longer."
Back of Motorcyclist's Jacket Reads: If you can read this, my girlfriend has fallen off.
Source of hilarity in big communications firm was an email to the VP of a vendor which referred to information stored on the floppy dic. Email circulated throughout the work place.
Warning Sign: "Caution: Attack Rooster."
Church Sign: "Sin is the hotdog in the windpipe of life."
Sign in Restaurant Bathroom on Ski Slope: "Please don't save seats."
In The Language:
A man with a cheating wife said he'd
"rather run through hell with gasoline
soaked drawers than go back to
her."
"It's colder than skinny dipping in a snow storm."
"Happy as a dead pig in the sunshine."
"That really puckers my butt."
"Wild as a hog on ice."
"...as rare as a peacock in a poultry pen."
"Sticks like ugly on an ape."
Sailboat bottom described as "slicker than snot."
Human Behavior:
-A woman was yawning outside and didn't bother to cover her mouth. She sucked in a bug.
-A teenage boy wearing very baggy
pants is walking down the street. His pants drop. He pulls them up and keeps
walking. A woman watching almost wrecks her car.
-A mother was laughing
hard at the dinner table. She spit her false teeth into the mashed
potatoes.
-A dying woman whose bed is surrounded by
student doctors opens her eyes suddenly and says boo! She is playful to the
end.
ANGER
Write
the name of the thing or person on the bottom of your shoes and walk on it.
Write it on the toilet paper, and well,
you know what to do.
SERIOUS ISSUES
Create a silly song about it.
Exaggerate the issue. i.e.., Depression--Whine to the max to anyone who will listen.
Exaggerate moaning.
Play with serious events: A man had his toes cut off. He played with it by answering
the
phone in his hospital room,
"Toes are us."
Name the issue: i.e.., High anxiety--"Nervous Nelly." Develop a phrase to work
with it--
"Nervous Nelly?
Not!"
Embarrassing Stories
(If you have a story to share,
click
here)
I am a wrestling coach and dignified female teacher. As a joke, my students gave me a t-shirt that said CO-ED NAKED WRESTLING with my name under it. The only place I could think to wear it was to bed as a night shirt. One night at midnight I had to run to Wal-Mart for a book so I threw on pants and wore my t-shirt without thinking. While standing in line I laughed and talked with other shoppers. I noticed they were looking at me oddly but knew of nothing out of the ordinary so I kept on talking. Only when I got home did I realize what t-shirt I had worn shopping. I was mortified to be identified by name as a coed naked wrestler who also had on her shirt "The mat is where it's at." I finally had to laugh. It was all I could do. S. A. Knoxville, TN.
I work in an office environment that's a bit particular. One day, I went to the bathroom and upon finishing was unaware I had tucked my dress into the top of my panty hose. I was mortified to discover I had walked about the office with my behind showing. B. G., Denton, TX.
One week day afternoon, I decided to go to the movies. By the time I got there, the previews had started and it was dark inside. I found an aisle seat and sat down. I was aware there weren't many people in the audience, but I was really embarrassed when the lights came up at the end and I discovered I had sat down by the only other person in the theater. I still wonder if he thinks I was a pervert of some kind. A. J., Omaha, NE.
I woke up one day on top of the world. I felt good and thought I looked good. I decided to wear all black because it's a good color on me. I chose black tights and shoes, black slip, black blouse, and black skirt. I pressed my skirt, dressed and left for work. I was really feeling sharp. I stopped for gas and was gratified to notice people looking at me. I thought, "They, too, must think I look good." After filling up the tank, I drove on to work, feeling like a million dollars. When I got to work, people were staring, and I beamed with pride. Then when I reached my section and walked in, my friends and co-workers started laughing. Following their eyes, I looked down and was absolutely appalled to realize I had forgotten my skirt. I made a break for my car, and spent the rest of the day hiding out at home. Thank God, I can laugh about it today. M.W., Dallas, TX.
Your bladder seems to be shrinking right when you need a larger capacity because you don't have time to go to the bathroom.
The bags under your eyes are almost getting large enough to carry your groceries.
You can't find your car keys because they're in the ignition.
You can't remember the names of family members although they certainly look familiar.
You lose consciousness upon starting your car and "come to" at your destination with no idea how you got there.
Your blood pressure causes the machine at the drug store to break.
You want to eat dinner but can't remember if you've already eaten and whether you enjoyed it if you have.
You want your 3 minute egg in two minutes.
You find yourself frantically searching a room for something but you have no idea what it is.
You stop to smell the roses and for one panicky moment, you're not sure why you're standing in front of a rose bush.
You leave on vacation and forget one of your children.
You feel compelled to wear a swim suit under your clothes because you can't get rid of the sensation you're treading water.
Your adrenaline starts to pump because your computer boots up too slowly.
You hear a grinding noise in the bedroom at night and realize it's you grinding your teeth.
You feel unfairly picked on because you have to wait for something/anything.
Instead of raising the garage door, you just back on through.
You prepare for the freeway by checking your weapons.
You board a plane for one city and feel put out that they took you to another just because you boarded the wrong plane.
You feel irritated when a real person answers the phone and you have to talk to them instead of their machine.
If you have 5 or more of these symptoms you are suffering from extreme stress. You must find a prescription for laughter. You are "dying" for a happier life.
©1999 Enda Junkins, PO Box 684, Ouray, CO 81427, 970-325-0050.
